Here we are again, approaching another Spring. Josh typically cycles in the Spring.
What makes this Spring different for Josh than past Springs is that he is on medication.
He has remained on his anti-convulsive and therefore, his life is moving along nicely.
I think he drinks occasionally, but more in a social way then an abusive way.
He has lived with his girlfriend for two years now, has done very well in his career making more than enough money to live on.
He actually is a lot of fun to be around and that really sweet guy I've always known, is the face I see all the time.
It's funny because when he talks about Bipolar he moves between speaking of it as just a part of himself and then other times he states that he's not convinced he has Bipolar.
What he has told me about being on medication is that he still sometimes feels depressed, but it's not as deep of a depression and it hangs in for a much shorter time period. Conversely, I still occasionally see him a bit 'speedy' and he will say he feels a bit 'speedy' every now and then, but again he's never manic and the speedy feeling is rather fleeting.
He copes amazingly well now that he's on medication. He has gone through some pretty stressful things during this last six months or so and he actually is calmer about it all than I seem to be.
I continue to read a great deal about Bipolar and know that there are many people who advocate for no medication, the thinking being that therapy and behavior modification/biofeedback, etc. can manage it. I think that's probably true for some people, but I know that for Josh, medication has made all the difference between a life worth living and suicide.
When I read the comments here and the emails I receive from other parents of children with Bipolar, I feel your pain. I hear the desperation in your words and remember well that desperation and hopelessness.
I pray that your children will eventually find their way to the right doctor and the right medication, because for me and my child, it has set our world 'right' again.